I hate hashtags but #MadBum

Madison Bumgarner delivered an absolute gem of a pitching start for game five of the World Series, pitching the first shutout in the World Series since 2003 when Josh Beckett pitched a shutout for the Marlins against the Yankees. If their is a better pitcher in postseason baseball who is currently playing I have yet to see him, Bumgarner is as calm as a Panda who just had sex while he is on the mound this October, and it is almost a shock to see him make a mistake.
The Giants are bringing the momentum back to Kansas City as in the last two games their hitting has been extremely on point, with 12 hits last night and 5 runs, Saturday getting 16 hits and 11 runs. To think that this series could go to 7 games is quite incredible for any baseball fan but for any Giants fan it's Giants in 6 games, for no one in the camp of Orange October will even ponder a loss on tuesday night. With Peavy hoping to come up with a good six inning show, and whoever that fastball pitcher is that Kansas City has pitching for them will hopefully pitch for a homerun derby as that is how hot Giants are currently.
What do I think of the Panda this World Series, well hitting .364 for the World Series with 4 RBI's and a couple of 2 baggers isn't shaby on top of his incredible work at third base, I say to the Giants please pay him this offseason because he has earned it, I know most likely he will be fair if you offer him something decent.
So fuck Joe Buck and the fake smurfs, tomorrow this World Series is coming to an end with a pandarific Giants win in Missouri.

Why does this even year feel so odd?

For this particular panda is currently living in a small town in France known to a few cultured people in the world as Paris, it's not much to look at but I call it home, and at least the scotch is cheap here. I miss my access to Oregon and Cali greens, and of course my personal arsenal of "smokies" (patent pending), Omars, and all the people that make Ashland the only hometown I will truly ever have. Though with game four just an hour away I need to look past all these things and chug a lug grimace my scotch down so I can ignore the fatigue that only cooks and chefs truly know, for alcohol can cure what ails you no matter the location or the weather.
We got Voggie starting and he's my ace at least for tonight, time change and all I might get to watch seven innings before the inevitable crash, but I will be drinking to defeating these replacement smurfs so call on azrael and any other anti Missouri team bullshit we can find. It is time to tie this series up in true Giants fashion and make everyone remember it is an even year, we win on these years and Huddy needs a goddamn ring for fucks sake, the AL sux balls and everyone knows it. No offense to all y'all ball lickers but seriously this is the night for a win for Orange and Black.
So if you see someone wearing blue tonight just punch them in the jeans for panda's are endangered and usually too lazy to fuck so we have some fake smurfs fucking up their ectasy, Gargamel is a good guy until the end of October, Papa Smurf can give Brainy some brain, and smurfette can go fuck herself.
Anywho go Giants and the bats are favoring us tonight because I said so and that is all that really matters, scotch scotch something I love something...

Mad Bum does it all through luck to defeat team named after cow breed

According to the experts in sports analysts before game one of the World Series, both teams were there by luck due to the expanded wildcard set ups that were not in place back when there were less teams in the league and there were even suggestions that the premier league some strange british league that plays fake football was the perfect system to find the best team in a league. Though these cunts know how to write I do not give them credit for having an operable brain, the fact that a system with no postseason whatsover would truly find the best team every year seems about as backwards and unamerican as saying I hate apple pie, I don't care if you're allergic you still love that shit.
If it is luck to play 162 games against an assortment of the total 30 teams in the league and end up in a wild card one game playoff, win that, proceed to win a best of five series followed by a best of seven series to end up in the World Series then I have been completely imagining the last 9 months I've spent in Paris and am still wasted in a bar in a small town in Oregon.
10 teams out of 30 get a shot at it, weird because in the NBA where there are also 30 teams, 16 teams get a shot at it, how odd how that seems like more teams, in the NFL they have 32 teams and 12 teams make it to the playoffs yet they never say it's luck if a wild card team wins it all.
This is backwards sports writer mentality from an age where the Dodgers didn't fail in the postseason and the Yankees were always favored, these dinosaurs miss the bullshit days so they wave wands over their computers and compile crap that no one should be forced to read or pretend to enjoy.
These are the two best teams in their sport because they have battled this far, if you don't like the fall classic get a new career, October is the best time of year and is getting more exciting thanks to these wild card teams packed with talent that get a chance to compete. The Royals getting the best record since the allstar break must be luck as well, and Madison Bumgarner being 3-0 in World Series games also, and don't forget Panda, his more patient hitting in October duly luck.
The Giants looked more poised in Game One due to experience and a great manager Bruce Bochy, not because the Royals had too much rest, they've been in three of the last five world series they know this stage, no surprise they scored 3 runs in the first inning.
If you want to talk about luck talk about Joe Buck still having a job, but apparently half assed hacks do great in this industry of sports.
Panda out, Go Giants!!!

First ever wild card World Series since wild card format change

Giants and Royals prepare for a historic World Series, the first time two wild card teams face off in the World Series since the format change to make two wild card teams in each league play one game to see who would advance, also only the second time in history that two wild card teams have faced each other in the World Series. The last was in 2002 when the Angels won against the Giants in the seven game series due to Joe Bucks inability to speak the english language, the Giants could've put the Angels away with only eight outs to win it all, though unfortunately Joe Buck continued to flap his jaws uselessly and finally wore down a strong Giants squad until they finally gave up a five run lead in game six.
Unfortunately for the human race Joe Buck will continue to bore and amaze by continuing to work for the FOX sports department as the role of village idiot, though San Francisco seems to be a bit more immune to Joe Buck's idiocy in 2014 so I believe even year still holds under the leadership of Bruce Bochy.
Both teams look incredibly unbeatable as they prepare for game one of the 2014 World Series which begins on Tuesday in Kansas City, we seem to be getting ready for one of the most exciting World Series' games in recent history, other then 2012 and 2010 of course.
So go buy your Panda hats, water your bamboo, and don't forget Orange October!!!

Giants itching for the pennant

With the glass of scotch filled high and his cigarette lit, the sports panda has his instrumentals booming in earphones ready to bring you the magic from these keys that I've been so shy from of late. Please do not blame me, blame my losing lottery tickets and a world society that doesn't allow us to pursue our passions, but fuck all that noise it's almost time for warm up pitches in game five of an incredibly exciting NLCS. We have ourselves the Giants who haven't hit a long ball in six straight postseason games and the Cardinals that seem to have no shortage of home runs, yet some magical way the Giants sit one win away from the covetted pennant. Small ball, or team baseball, or simply a team designed for October whatever you want to call it it is a fact this team has a winning attitude at the plate and on defense. The Panda is ready for the World Series, are you? For as far as I can tell we have not lost our command of this time and place and I believe in the even year superstition.
Buster Posey got his team into this position after a great game last night, Panda hasn't been too shy either and it looks like the Cardinals might start acting like a canary in a cage babbling about puddy tats with less luck, and this time the black and white creature ready to devour is not a pussy.
Bumgarner is back on the mound tonight and if I had placed any bets for tonights results there would be no feathers gaining victory, I believe it's time to get ready for Tuesday in Kansas City.
Well good night y'all no Panda's were injured in the making of this post except for at least one's liver.

Who cares about Sports?

Sports are the pain and the anguish in my veins, the untiring hunger I have in my mind for that lost friend my blind eyes miss. Is it love or hate that make me question the color of my bedding or the beers I drink, in reality who gives a fuck if my team wins, but why is my life a spider web of poison filled decisions? Only because that lottery ticket is a winner and those box seats are coming my way, or if not god forgive me or atleast my boss, fuck this life it's lost in replay's and a bottle. Give me an ashtray to carry my soul and a dust pan for my shattered heart, the scotch and nicotine may handle the loss of my ability to be social or care about the normalcy that everyone else craves. So if you hate smurfs from april until november and wish they gave paid game day's off join this crazy Panda in a plea towards the dark side of the gambling ticket that decides to be a winner just because I believed hard enough.

My room needs some sweeping

Get your brooms ready, my room is messy and the only thing that will motivate a clean floor is a sweep. Anyways back to baseball where the best team in the National League as far as regular season record is concerned is facing getting swept by the team that squeeked in to the post season barely.
The giants have one of the best managers in MLB history at the helm and a team that seems ready for any challenge including tying up a game two in the ninth and winning that same game in the eighteenth. This is a beautiful time for fans in AT&T park to give ace Madison Bumgarner support to finish off the Washington Nationals and be the third team this postseason to sweep their opponent.
So baseball fans grab your beer, your panda hats of orange and black, and don't forget your brooms.
If you are worried about the fact that the MLB Network is being assholes having the only showing of the game just say f§ck it and stream the game!!!

Peavy stands tall, and Santiago Casilla finishes it off

We may not of heard any awesome words about nimble or graceful pandas in this nail biter of a game one of the NLDS in Washington but the Giants did steal game one away from the team with the best record in the National League in the regular season. This San Francisco team is using a combination of veterans and very talented rookies to make this seem like any other postseason they have had in the past five seasons, the team that seems unlikely to win yet somehow seems so ready to make it happen. A 3-2 win in game one is completely the way they would've done it in 2010 or 2012 so why not continue on this bizarre dance they have been stepping through for quite a while. Pitching and batting towards what the opposing pitcher will give you won this one without a doubt, as well as a bit of Panda overload for D.C. residents, these folks can handle crack smoking mayor's but you give them more than one panda in the capital city and they can barely pull off a rally cap.

Another Panda has arrived in D.C.

Is two Panda's in Washington too many for Nationals pitcher Strasburg's mind to handle, or can he fight through the vicious black and white images of graceful panda's rolling through his mind. We are sure that Strasburg is accustomed to the presence of Tai Shan in the city but will this new panda in town be pandaoverload for the young pitchers mind, who can really know if he may have a childhood fear of bamboo, or simply cannot handle the overall cuteness of Pandas in general.
Jake Peavy will be starting for the Giants and we know he is accustomed to the east coast and giants fans are hopeful that his experience and skill can help give the Giants a game one win. We know that our Panda does like to show his skill at bat in the postseason  against aces, though how will all the other giants do at bat against the skilled pitching staff of the Nationals.
Postseason heat and over all Orange and Black are October esque colors, so put on those panda hats some one let Tai Shan her baseball team will be defeated honorably by a fellow panda, let's get some bamboo on the barbeque or in the curry however you like it, crack open some cold ones and let's enjoy a San Francisco win this afternoon, or evening if you happen to be watching from western europe.

Cricket?

Is it cricket season? Oh wait who cares? Panda is two of three right now and luckily enough I only work in six hours and change, so yeah I might get to watch most of this game. For f%cks sake let's go giants because no one is anti gargamel this time of year. Mad Bum has 7 strike outs through five and looks as good as gold, the bucs seem out of sorts since the grand slam by Brandon Crawford in the fourth, Giants need to stay hot and get this game out of reach or atleast be one with their gloves by keeping the Pirates off the board. This could be the start of a beautiful postseason for the Giants but one never knows so let's lose some sleep and live and die for the Orange and Black, for if San Francisco doesn't keep it's on and off World Serie. winning I may no longer understand the world of sports let alone the best sport in the world of baseball!

Royal postseason drought over

If we wanted the possibility of a Battle of the Bay the Royals made sure those dreams were crushed with a stunning comeback after being down by four runs until the bottom of the eighth. They came back to 7-6 in the bottom of the eighth though left the tying run on base, they tied it up with small ball in the bottom of the ninth. Then in the twelfth the A's scored though Kansas City came back tied it up then got the walk of winning run. The Royals win this one 9-8 in a truly beautiful game of baseball, their first postseason win since 1985 when they won the World Series.
Kansas City will go on to play the Angels (the LA team I don't hate) in the ALDS, the A's go home wondering what could've been, but this is what the one game playoff wild card game is all about.
Good baseball is good baseball and this game was an instant classic, if Kansas City can get past the smoking hot Angels they will be considered a good pick for the World Series but we shall see.
There is no crying in baseball but I think Coco Crisp and the rest of this Oakland team might be drying their cheeks just a bit in the next few days.
So if it's barbeque you love then catch those tickets to the Kansas City home games in the best of 5 ALDS against LA, for this team looks strong and might be going far in October, more great games seem to be on the horizon and I can not always say that.